From the book
I didn't want to be a 'loser' like my mother, because everyone in her family resented her for being divorced. According to them, only 'loose' women without strong principles did that. This rhetoric had stuck with me, and in fear of hearing that same rhetoric, I did not give up my married life and continued to endure domestic violence. This rhetoric stuck with me because I didn’t yet realize that there was no truth in it. It had been an injustice against my mother, and I was participating in that injustice by putting the label of loser on her as well. Instead of receiving protection, she was even more excluded from her family's social circle, so for both she and I and her other children, that period was quite traumatic.
But after my own divorce, when that rhetoric came from my social circle, I knew that I had not acted out of weakness, I did not feel like a loser – quite the opposite. I had acted out of self-respect, out of my inner power. However, that did not stop me from isolating myself from social contacts.